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All day at work I was asking myself if I really wanted to get back into a committed relationship with Mandy. I couldn't forget what happened that caused us to break up and come fall she would be going off to college. She was going to Baylor in Texas and I wouldn't see her except for holiday breaks and vacation. As much as she like sex I didn't think she would go without while she was gone. Plus the length of time we would be apart would give her plenty of opportunity to get into a long term relationship.Then again, one thing that I'm not is a hypocrite. I wouldn't be going without while she was gone, at least not on purpose. I wasn't going to go without when Pauline was gone so why would I when Mandy was gone. Granted it would have been a hell of a lot easier in Pauline's case because of her mother. I didn't have that option with Mandy and even if I did I wouldn't take it. Mandy's mom looked like Aunt Bea on the television show Mayberry.Then I had to ask myself why I was even wasting. That's probably for the best anyway, I reasoned. I need to get my head right and remember my masculine identity. Lori will be expecting sex tonight.Normally, I would be looking forward to banging my wife. But the thought of it was making me anxious. I had not been inclined to stimulate myself, as a male, in days. What if I can't get hard? I worried. So, while the laundry was drying, I spent a little time watching straight porn online. Fortunately, my body responded to the visual stimulation and produced an erection. As I watched the porn and masturbated, I couldn't stop my mind from imagining that I was the girl in the videos. My dick felt good and hard in my hand, but I wanted it to be Mark's. "Oh, fuck this!" I said out loud. I went to the dresser, pulled out a pair of panties and Lori's vibrator. Then I slid back into the pink dress and heels. I won't be in it very long, but I have to do this, I thought.I lay down on the bed and immediately begin teasing myself with the vibrator.
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