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I had him buried upside down ... and I know he won’t ask for directions.”A radioactive cat has 18 half-lives.A lonely frog goes to a psychic to find out about his future. The psychic tells him, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”The frog is thrilled and says, “This is great! Where will I meet her? At work, at a party?”“No,” says the psychic, “in a biology class.”Two chemists, a brunette and a blonde, walk into a bar.The brunette says, “I’ll have some H2O.”The blonde says, “I’ll have some H2O, too.”The blonde died.There’s a new kind of coffee that acts as a strong laxative.It’s called G.I. JoeHow do two cats make love?The male cat goes to the female cat and says ‘naaaoooouuuw’.And the female cat responds by saying, ‘not naaaoooouuuw’.If you rob a bank in a sanctuary city, is it “illegal”, or just an “undocumented withdrawal”?What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and ET?ET learned to speak English and wanted to go. She is standing by the bed – awaiting me. I turn her round roughly and without warning viciously rake the top of her expansive back with my nails. She winces and shudders with the pain but she has to take it till I have had enough… not her, the slut. Her nipples are engorged and the odour from her moist fanny hangs heavy in the air. I notice tiny little droplets of bl**d have begun to form along the cruel scratches I have inflicted – it is time. I throw her down roughly onto the mattress and thrust my seven inch cock into her cunt. I make her rub and suck my nipples – she exists purely, like all women should, for my gratification. It feels facking good and our rhythm is synchronised. We reach the crescendo of our coupling and climax simultaneously – it is a unique attribute she has… and she is fortunate to possess it as I do not concern myself with a slut’s pleasure. * * * She is laying next to me now all relaxed and clingy… radiating ugliness. ‘Jules, what would you have done if.
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