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Knowing what a female orgasm feels like for you. It's all Iwanted to give you. And once I started to experience those thingsmyself, I was absolutely drawn to them. I find the female body soattractive - I always have. I love the way that women can use clothesto look sexy but even more to feel sexy and... complete."John continued, "Lori helped me break down my inhibitions. It's anamazing thing to be able to experience what it feels like to be femalebut it's another to allow it to happen. In little steps the excitementand exploration of those feelings and experiences took me further...made me accept more... made me want more."John's hand cupped his left breast and he fondled the nipple. It wenthard instantly. "Admiring female breasts is one thing. Having my ownis another. Along the way, I decided that I WANTED to have them... thatit felt natural to want them and to have them." The fingers of his lefthand now gentle rubbed at his muff."I let it happen. I wanted it to. However, we did chat again the next night, and the night after that. He sent me charming e-mails during the day, calling me by the name of his choice, Susanna. He kept stressing that he was genuine, single, and was looking for a special girl like me. There was no stress, he said, just pop up and see how I felt. If I didn't find that I liked acting in the female role then I could leave immediately and we'd call it a day.As I said earlier, I had been following this pointless pattern for several years and, at 25, really was feeling the need to express my femininity with someone else, just in case I did realize I was a transsexual and wanted to take it further. I would want to experience being a girl still in her twenties. I'd read countless stories of men who had denied these feelings for decades and, when they finally decided they could ignore them no more, had changed in their fifties - although they were invariably happy with this, I would want to live the majority of my life as a.
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