Well, here goes:“Hit it.”If I were a rich man, Yubby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dum.All day long I’d biddy biddy bum.If I were a wealthy man.I wouldn’t have to work hard.Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.If I were a biddy biddy rich, Idle-diddle-daidle-daidle man.Yes, indeed: Oleg had picked ‘If I Were A Rich Man’, from the 1964 musical. I didn’t know the words verbatim, but well enough to get by with the occasional glance at the iPad. There’s only one song that’s MORE Jewish, and that’s Hava Nagila. So obviously it’s ideal for a ship filled with Arabs, in the middle of the Gulf. Or actually about five miles away from the Dubai shore line, as we were headed back. But as with so many songs: the audience didn’t understand half of it. It’s like when people think ‘99 Luftballons’ is about balloons, or REM’s ‘The One I Love’ is a love song. Like a bunch of patriotic Americans belting out ‘Born In The USA’, oblivious to it’s real meaning, this crowd of mostly rich. Friday came and I told a friend that I had a business meeting in L.A. and asked him for a ride. I didn’t want to take my own car just in case I tried to chicken out. About fifteen minutes after I was dropped off, a low rider car pulled into the parking lot and parked. I saw that the driver was the man I was there to meet, and my heart was pounding. I was feeling scared and I began to wonder if that meeting was a good idea. There were three men in the car and all of them got out and walked towards me. The other two were also Cholo’s, and I then realized that all of them were gang members, or at least they use to be. I was trembling as Flaco stepped up in my face. He put his hand on my neck and put his face next to mine and firmly said, “Let me hear it.” I knew what he wanted me to say, so I said, “I’m your bitch. Do whatever you want to me.” he said, “these are my home-boys and they are going to play with you as well.” I said, “I’ll do whatever you guys want.” It was to late to.
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