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I spent the week stewing. Was he serious? Was he really cheating? I was so convinced before, but now I was pretty sure he was just playing with my head. I didn't call him all week and for his part he didn't call me. I shared the ordeal with Jeff who was supportive through the week. On Friday I realized I was going to have to go home and deal with the situation when Jeff peeked his head in the door and asked if I wanted to grab a drink before heading home. I jumped at the excuse not to go home and agreed. The bar was crowded and I began drinking heavily. By midnight I was blitzed and Jeff offered to drive me home. I took him up on his offer. We walked to his car and he put me in the passenger seat and then he walked around to the drivers seat. When he sat down he didn't start the car. Instead he looked at me and told me that my husband was a fool for cheating on me. He began telling me how attractive I was. How he had had a crush on me since he took the job. How he had often thought. So the rest of the day was okay I guess. Mum was being a bitch ’cause I didn’t wash the dishes before she went to bed, which was all of five minutes after tea. I’ve done them now, but I left a message on the board on the fridge saying ‘Happy now?’ I don’t feel so angry now… maybe I’ll take it off. Night. – Nic TUESDAY. DAY 3. No work. No work means no Casey. Ah well. Having only seen her a couple of times and considering I don’t really know much about her I shouldn’t have been as cut as I was when she left yesterday. Haven’t really done much. I wish I could have that dream again. It was perfect. Beautiful and gave me that same intense feeling that I have when I see or think of Casey now. Incredible. So yeah. Day boring. No work. No Casey – even worse. -Nic MONDAY (12.30-5.30). DAY 2. Casey was in again. Omg she’s so beautiful and wonderful and amazing and hot and gorgeous and the simple, needy, wanting part of my brain is interpreting everything she says and how she looks at me.
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