Freud and made light, inconsequential conversation as though to establish a remoteness between us. With a sensibility I should have known he would display despite his youth he had elected not to use his bed as a treatment couch but instead drawn his table into the centre of the room and covered it with a cloth. As he helped me climb onto the table my knees were weak to the point that he practically had to lift me like a helpless babe, but it was not fear that I felt. More a kind of dreamlike disbelief that it was happening - that I was allowing it to happen as though a small part of my mind was screaming at me to desist and withdraw from what S(igmund) was intending to do, yet the greater part of me was wilfully blind and deaf to it. With great solicitation Sigi made me comfortable in the table, with cushions beneath my head, back and knees, and then covered my face with a light, rosewater-scented cloth, although whether that was to save my blushes or his I cannot say.Next he. LeaPart FourChapter SixteenThe Saturday morning of Lady Carrington's daughter's wedding dawnedbright and clear. Thursday night, Laura, Danielle and I as Karen, hadgone shopping for clothes, a uniform so to speak. We settled on whiteshort sleeved blouses with navy blue above the knee skirts, tan pantyhose and three inch navy blue pumps with a block heel.After a small breakfast, I went through my bathing ritual, then nails.Danielle and Laura had done their nails the night before in the sameshade and we had matching lipsticks. By ten thirty, only wig andlipstick to go. The door bell peeled and I let Danielle in, she wasready, looking very smart. "Mum will be five minutes."I gave her the keys to the Rover, and she backed it from the garage torun the air conditioning as it was a typical Sydney February day, hotand humid. I returned to the bedroom and selected a short dark wig,then put some lip gloss on the back of my hand and then using a smalllip brush on the lipstick and mixing it with.
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