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- I heard your mom likes basketball. She should be our coach- Hey Chris when can we come at you to play some… uhmm.. video games on your…. Playstation (chuckling)- Dude if you feel lonely I can become your father. What do you think? That motherfucker just told everybody about his adventure. Now everybody calls me a son of a bitch. What’s worse? Well he fucked my mother raw. He filled her womb with millions of African spermatozoids. My mom is pregnant with twins. She doesn’t want to abort as she considers this a crime.- Hey son. I have good news for you. You’re gonna be a brother.- WHAT? I asked furiously. - Aren’t you happy? You’re not gonna be alone anymore. I will have twins.I felt like I’m going insane.- No fucking way. I can’t believe you’re doing this to me. Whole schools bully me because of you.- Why? What happened sweetheart?- WHAT HAPPENED?! YOU FUCKED MY CLASSMATE THAT’S WHAT HAPPPENED. HE IMPREGNATED YOU AND YOU’RE NOT EVEN ASHAMED. YOU’RE A FUCKING SLUT. I DON’T WANNA SEE. Still ... it could be me on the toilet, so I’ll see if I can fix it”“Gross!” said Erica.Fixing the bathroom lock was easy enough. Terri watched as I lit a match and then snubbed it out and broke pieces off. “Why did you light the match? Does that make it stronger?”“No, but I don’t want it to light in the hole do?”“Would it do that?”“I don’t know”“Then why light it if you don’t know? And you’ve not even used that part!” I did try to explain that it was just a safety precaution, but she really didn’t get it, I could tell. The small pieces of wood compressed as I screwed the screws back in; they jammed hard into the holes and held securely. Four girls looked on with, I swear, something like amazed respect at how I had fixed the wobbly lock. Apparently Gramps had been ‘going to get round to it’ since they arrived. Dave the super-handy-man. I wondered if I should put on a cape and put my underpants on outside my trousers; but thought that might be over the top.“Gramps nearly walked in on.
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