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” “I’m not kind," I wink and laugh. "I'm horny." Steve begins to stammer. “I…” He coughs. ”Ummm. OK.” “Do I make you nervous, Steve? You look like a successful, confident businessman. Surely you don't become ruffled when a woman tells you she wants to share a sandwich with you. Or when she says that after lunch she wants us to eat each other for dessert?” “Ummm.” Steve looks around uncomfortably. “I was just taken aback a little bit. Let's have lunch and see how it goes.” I start to feel annoyed again. “See how it goes? You don't want to fuck me, Steve?” I pout. “Well, you're a beautiful woman,” he smiles nervously. “Do beautiful women intimidate you?” I squeeze his cock through his well-tailored suit trousers. “Beautiful women need to be fucked too, Steve. I thought you were different than most guys. Not intimidated by beauty. And willing to satisfy.” I pause, then I continue “I've seen you before, you know. I've listened to you close million-dollar sales on your cell. Nine Important Facts to Remember as We Grow Older#9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world.#8 Life is sexually transmitted.#7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.#6 Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can’t tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.#5 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.#4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.#3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.#2 In the 60’s, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.#1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow.Please share this wisdom with others while I go to the bathroom.This is compliments of PepereOld one, but still good for a.
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