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“That’s the £8,000 you have coming Sister,” he replied. “Don’t Despair paid 80-to-1.”An elderly couple was sitting together watching television. During a commercial break, the husband asked his wife, “Whatever happened to our sexual relations?”After a long thoughtful silence and during the next commercial, the wife replied, “You know, I’ve no idea. I don’t even think we got a Christmas card from them last year.”Yesterday I was at my local Supermarket buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I’m retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the Winalot Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in hospital last time. I’d lost 2 stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.I told her that it was essentially a. . all of them had grown up going to school together and she wanted them all to graduate together. And it wasn't Breanna's fault that Jessica preferred girls!"Relax, Breanna, I'm not going to do anything to hurt you. I do still love you. And I know that if I tell you to break up with Jimmy, you'll just sneak around and see him anyway. I know you too well. Besides, I know that Jimmy knows about the texts and if you broke up with him, he would just snoop around until he found out what was going on and try to stop me."So I'm going to let you have your little prick. But you, my dear, are going to suddenly become bisexual... you can have your Jimmy, but you are also going to be my playtoy as well," she said."What do you mean?" Breanna asked."You are going to be on call, Breanna. Anytime I want to go out with you and do something or anytime I want to get together for sex, you will make yourself available to me. You are going to be my sex slave, my own personal slut - you seem to like being a.
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