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The whole thing's a crooked game. Like those tours they sell. Jack up the prices for fleabag hotels. Charge $25 for a T-shirt that fades in five days. It's all a rook. Des knows. Ask her -- she was talking about it last week. And is she getting a penny from those 'Des the Destroyer' nutcrackers? Not a damn cent! It's all a rip-off!" Stop it," Jon said. "Stop it this instant!" As he said it while cowering on the couch, it wasn't very impressive.Des took a more forceful approach, leaping into the air and landing on Pete's back. "You're a lunatic," she yelled, hands around his neck. "Shut up or they'll throw us out and we won't get anything! You may not care, but I need that money."Pete pried her off and advanced on the cameras. He grabbed the lens of the one with the glowing red light and stuck his face just inches away."Hear me, America! The only thing more unbelievable than how phony this is, is how you nitwits swallow it. Why are you watching this? Don't you people have anything. After many years of ruling the island, the weight of the large number of birthday presents stored up in the attic became too heavy and caused the house to fall down. The moral of the story is that people in grass houses shouldn’t stow thrones. There was a man who entered a local paper’s pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.Unfortunately, no pun in ten did. A doctor made it his regular habit to stop off at a bar for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home. The bartender knew of his habit, and would always have the drink waiting at precisely 5:03 p.m. One afternoon, as the end of the work day approached, the bartender was dismayed to find that he was out of hazelnut extract. Thinking quickly, he threw together a daiquiri made with hickory nuts and set it on the bar. The doctor came in at his regular time, took one sip of the drink and exclaimed, “This isn’t a hazelnut daiquiri!”“No, I’m sorry,” replied the bartender,.
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