She told me she had a copy of the tape, but that she wanted to see my ass "get it" in person. I told her no way. I tried to indicate that any ideas she had along that line were hopeless. But she had another idea--she asked me how I'd like the guys at work to see the tape. I felt trapped. I looked at her amused face. I knew there was no escape. She told Sara that I was going to give them both a show. I don't know if Sara knew about Leah's blackmail. But Sara seemed ready to get me to do it again, whatever it took. I felt faint. They decided on the following night. Leah and Dave showed up. There I was, not bound by ropes, but with no choice! They had me strip and get over the ottoman again. Leah had a camcorder. Sara tied me up and gagged me. Maybe I wouldn't have been able to go through with it without being tied. I shudder to think. Dave did it again. I hate to say it, but though it was just as humiliating as the first time, it was somehow also easier. I just tried to let them get it. " He was sick for so long, from his war wounds. He lived longer than we thought he would, but... It was hard on Mother. That's two men the war took from her, her husband and her brother." She stared ahead pensively, then blinked awake. "Well. Enough of that."I said earnestly from across the room, "I'm real sorry, Martha Jane."She smiled. "Thank you, hon. I know you are. It'll be all right." She looked back at her book and began scribbling in her notepad.For a long time--perhaps for most of the evening, it seems--she pored over her studies and remained unresponsive.Later that night I felt she was still mourning, despite saying she would get over it. I had seen a whole neighborhood full of hurt, tragic people: widows, the disabled and the paralyzed, the shot-up and the abandoned of the War. I had seen my mom's sister, my young and plain looking Aunt Martha, when she came to our apartment once in the middle of the night, pounding on our front door and screaming for help until she woke.
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