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Vicar: Now Mrs Jones, I’ve been meaning to ask you are you interested in being involved in our Parish ladies calendar. It’s to raise funds for the church roof?Mrs Jones. Yes, certainly Vicar if there is anything I can do to help?Vicar: That’s great Mrs Jones. It was the Bishops idea. Mrs Jones. What form is it going to take?Vicar: Well I thought we’d have a lady for each month. And maybe with a group picture on the cover. Mrs Jones. Has there been much interest in supporting it?Vicar: Oh, yes. I’ve already been approached by a number of Ladies.Mrs Jones. Excellent. Well if you want me to help I’d be very happy to in any way I can.Vicar. Oh, that’s very kind Mrs Jones. As it happens I am looking for someone for the July slot. Mrs Jones. Well I’d be very happy to help out. Vicar. Yes, Mrs Jones. I’m sure you are my dear. But we ought to do a little screen test first just to confirm.The Vicar places his hand on Mrs Jones’s knee and squeezes it.Mrs Jones. Oh, Certainly Vicar. What had you. . not. What the hell happened?" The Black Snake bikers happened to me. You remember Shaneequa?" That high school girl that worked at Starbucks? The one with the killer bod who always seemed about to pop out of her clothes? Oh, yeah! Black and jailbait is a dangerous combination, but I'd sure risk it if I thought I had a chance to get me a piece of that." That's how I felt. That's why I was dating her on the sly. My folks would freak if they knew, and hers would probably turn me in to the law. And you know how rough the Sheriff is on sex-offenders – especially White guys like me. So I was real careful not to dip my wick until she was legal. The first Friday after her eighteenth birthday, I picked her up after work and drove her up to my uncle's cabin on Bear Mountain Lake. We were gonna spend the weekend getting to know each other. By which I mean I intended to fuck the shit out of her. Who wouldn't? The girl is one amazing piece of ass. Perfect skin the color of dark chocolate,.
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