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I was with Em through every minute of that wondrous day.Lady H lived to see her grandson's first steps and hear his first words, but it was as if having a male heir at last meant she could let go, and once she was certain he was healthy, bright and beautiful, she seemed to welcome the end. She died in her sleep in bed, which is all any of us can ask for. The happiness of her final days made losing her considerably easier to bear. She left me her jewellery, and the memory of a very special friendship.I think Em and I made good parents, Mark is now twenty-four years old. He's big, and burly, with his Dad's abundance of dark hair. With the typical contrariness of youth, it looks like he's going to follow his Dad's career as well. A while ago he asked me the kind of questions about his birth parents' lives that it was very difficult to answer. I decided to write this memoir for him. He isn't squeamish, but he'll be embarrassed by the sex. He's known about our S&M devotion since he was. The sex had not been all that great tonight and shehad run a hot bath in the garden tub and lingered in the suds afterFrank had left. He had seemed distracted and not fully present. Shewondered if there was somebody else, then felt foolish. Of course,dummy. With a guy like Frank there was always somebody else. Shit! Shewas one of those "somebody elses" to God knows how many other women heslept with. She really ought to demand he use a condom, she remindedherself after the fact for the umpteenth time.Frank had even slipped tonight and called out a different name in thethroes of passion. But, as degrading and loveless as the sex was, it wasstill pretty damned hot, especially compared to Billy's lovemaking. Hehad always been tender and attentive, but always so inhibited. Therewere too many nights when he seemed unable to even enjoy being touchedin any way. She knew his highly religious parents had damaged him thatway. But, he did not seem able to loosen up and get past it. Or maybe.
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