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“I’m crying because of all the people I’ve granted access to my body in order to show my favor or because they could give me something I wanted. I’m crying because all the dreams I had as a little girl about how wonderful love and life would be are coming true. Mostly I’m crying because I’ve deprived myself – and you – of eight months of bliss because I’m stupid and shallow and selfish.”She returned to her spot on Phil’s shoulder.“Maybe not,” Phil said. “I’ve grown because of what happened. I’m not the naïve waif who thought he could change the world with a kind word or a smile any more. You would have gotten tired of that pretty quickly – and I would have gotten tired of you pretty quickly, too.”“I think I would have learned from you then just as I’m learning from you now,” Hailey replied.“That wasn’t what I meant,” Phil replied. “I never kept a girlfriend for long in high school. Part of it was because I constantly worried that they liked my family name more than me but another. Adriana knew, Cyril was at a point in his life where he needed his self-esteem to be boosted to deal and keep the girls in his life. She spoke with couple of the women she knew but found out that all of them were uncomfortable, not so much for being with a younger man but particularly with her younger brother. She did not want to press too hard but then the things were not going the way she wanted and thought it would. She did not want her little brother to be devastated.Cyril was gone back to his dorm and she was running the possibilities, sitting at home. It seemed as if she was the only female who loved and cared for her brother. Then it suddenly dawned on her, but no. She could not do it. Yes she loved Cyril and wanted him to be happy but still, not that. She could talk to him about self-esteem, teach him about sex in a loving way, better than any other woman but she could not offer herself to be his woman for sex. She should not even think this. Watching TV could not get the.
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