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.Alan: I mean it's not like I'm cheating on her. I told her the only f-word here is fantasy, right?Carrie: Did someone say the f-word? I wanna fuck!Alan: She says she is embarrassed to tell her friends I write sex stories for the net. She says I'm just an Internet pornographer. I told her someone has to write Internet pornography. I mean, it's not going to write itself, right?Pete: Here, here!Alan: She says me being on this sex fantasy site can only lead to no good. She says pretty soon I'll be hanging out with a bunch of perverts.(There is a murmur in the crowd.)Pete: Uh, we don't like that word here.Bob: No, Sheepy-Poo does not like that word. Would you like to touch Sheepy-Poo?Charles: Uh, Bob. Not everyone shares your fantasy about gang banging your inflatable sheep. Please.Bob: But Sheepy-Poo would like that.Alan: Dude, uh what is with you and Sheepy-Poo? I mean it's a fuckin' inflatable sheep for Christ sakes!Carrie: Did someone say fuck? I wanna fuck!Charles: OK, look, calm. There’s always a master key there.”“Then hold tight, I’ll cover for you, and get you out as soon as I can!”I shot her one last reassuring glance, turned off the lights and then raced down to meet Emily at the door.Emily had several suitcases, and she looked impatient. No doubt she’d been expecting us to greet her right away, and wasn’t impressed that we hadn’t been there to help her.“I’m sorry I took so long Emily. Sarah’s started to feel a bit sick, and I was keeping her company in her room.” My flimsy cover story spilled out in a rush. I didn’t sound very convincing, but maternal instincts must have saved me, because Emily immediately looked concerned.“Why didn’t you two call me when she got sick? How bad is she?”“Don’t worry. She’s just feeling a bit feverish, and she has a small headache. We didn’t think it was bad enough to call you about.”I was amazed Emily couldn’t see through my pathetic lies. Cleary worry for Sarah’s health was making her overlook everything else. Her.
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