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" You won't let me." What do you mean?" My husband is dead ... and you keep telling me that. Give it a rest. The man who murdered him is dead and I have had my revenge." You haven't grieved." I don't need to ... I got even." Oh." You don't see it, do you? I'll bet you believe that gun control and the courts will save the country." Well, I abhor violence. Let the law handle it." It's a violent world..." Acts of God..." You must be one of those who believe that we're the culmination of His works." Well..." We're not." But..." We're part of Nature ... any other belief is plain ignorance." I believe we're here to glorify God." God doesn't care." How can you say that." He killed my husband." She got up and walked out. Then she turned back and leaned in the door, "Don't schedule me again ... I've put up with you people for two years ... did you know you're the tenth licensed professional I've seen in two years? How much money has the state paid out to help me? I won't be back and I won't. As tempting as this offer is, I cannot seem to fight off the desire for something more. In addition to this hopeless love that I feel, I find myself seething with anger at the fact that not once yet has he said anything to the effect of "I love you" or "I still love you." When it seemed to be no problem for him to express it in secret before. Hell, I think even an "I miss you" would suffice but instead, it has been "I still care for you," which only make me feel even more ridiculous about the way that I feel as well as disgusted with myself for allowing this to happen in the first place. I feel so foolish for having allowed myself to be caught up in a tangled web that only turned out to be full of lies and unrealistic dreams and expectations. As hard has it is to explain and in spite of all the hurt he has caused, I still believe that he is the person I am meant to be with in this life. It is not every day that you find someone who makes you feel the way he has made me feel and as.
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