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" That must have made dating hard on you then," Natalie said, trying to get her to reveal more personal details."Oh, it was," Cate said, ignoring her wrapping as she got caught up in her story, relieved to finally confess everything to people who understood what her experiences were like. "It didn't take long to realize that no one was close to Alex, but I just thought I was meeting all the wrong guys. I assumed there were a lot more toads than anyone was willing to admit, but that there must be plenty of other princes like Alex out there waiting for me, so I figured I'd just wait for them to show up one day. That's why I never did much with anyone, and why I essentially just stopped dating altogether. I never once felt either safe or secure with any guy I ever met. They didn't even have to get forward with me, they'd just look at me and I could feel their desire, and that I never amounted to more than a couple of breasts to them and that they'd tell me any lie they could think of. Once he was out of sight, I ran into the house, tore off my clothes, grabbed a dildo, and proceeded to fuck myself silly. This time, however, the stud in my imagination wasn't faceless, he was definitely Mike. When I had finally satisfied myself, I threw my dirty clothes downstairs to get washed, and got dressed in something a little more appropriate for a teenage girl. Later, when I went to fuck myself again, I discovered that I had done something I hadn't planned on. In my rush, I had grabbed the first dildo I touched when I reached into the drawer. Now I realized, I had grabbed the largest one in the drawer. It was nearly twelve inches long, nearly as thick as my wrist, all black, and unmistakably shaped like a dick. Having done it once, I decided, why not do it again. And so I did, a couple of times. I had just barely gotten it back in my mothers drawer when I heard her pull her car into the driveway. The next several weeks were in some ways, the best of my life thus far. After.
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