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He looked so peaceful; I justcouldn't bring myself to move him. So I sat there and finished readingthe book to myself. (Let me tell you it was riveting!) But alas, Ifinished all too quickly. It was then that I realized that the remotecontrol was beyond my reach. (ARRGGG!!!) What was I to do? I didn'trealty want to chance waking him op, but another round of ham and eggsdidn't exactly light my fire either. What to do? What to do? Just as Iwas about to take the plunge and chance waking him, he squirmed aroundand settled off of me. (SAVED!!!)I carefully worked the rest of the way out from under him and quietlywent into the kitchen. Once there I poured myself something to drink andsat back down to finish reading the paper. I was just getting back intoit when the phone rang. I looked at it indecisively for a moment beforegetting up to answer it."Hello," I said."Hi. Amanda? This is Mike. The guy you're supposed to be going out withtonight," he stammered nervously.His nervousness made me. I had only barely glanced at his display picture and these girls had probably seen what he’d looked like in college.“It’s easily achievable. Step one: have a body like Celine. Step two: have a face like Celine. Step three: have an attitude like Celine. And step four: be Celine,” Addie said, smacking her lips after applying a new layer of lipstick. I didn’t know why she bothered. She was about to eat a sloppy, greasy burger.“You guys are so full of shit. You’re not getting pay raises for buttering me up.”“If you’d stop dressing like a fifty-year-old accountant you might see what we’re talking about,” Rita said, passing Addie back her phone.I was used to this. Rita and Addie were my friends. They always felt obligated to compliment me, as if I was some sad little pathetic pariah that needed a confidence boost to find a boyfriend. They were both absolutely certain that I had a stick up my ass because I didn’t get laid often enough. They were right about the laid part, but I’ve always.
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