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For this last semester, Marie had decided to add theater studies to her curriculum. It would be a nice addition to her resumé, while searching for a teaching position.It was in the beginning of March when I started getting uneasy feelings every now and then. I did my best to talk to Marie, but nothing seemed to help.Then one evening at the beginning of March, when Marie got home, and I immediately got the bad vibes. There was some sadness in her and I did my best to give her some solace. Or I would have, if she had allowed me to. It was only in the evening in bed that she allowed me to hold her and still I felt that she was holding back her tears. Inside me, I knew what had happened. Once again, everything was shattered to pieces. I just did my best to hold things together.I guess that Marie did not understand that as I took care of the finances, I would see from there that she had visited the college clinic. From the list of services rendered, I could easily see why see had been. "Do I look shameful?" Of course not," I said. That was a stupid question."But why not? I am female and you said females are shameful." Because," I said. "You're supposed to be a girl. It's not shameful ifthat's how you're supposed to be." This should have been obvious."So why is it different for you than for me?" Tiger girl asked."Because I was a boy!" I shouted. "I was born a goddamn boy and I can'tchange that even if I want to. Why the hell can't you understand thatyou dumb bitch!" I'm sorry," I whimpered, shocked I'd called Tiger Girl a bitch.Her eyes blazed. I expected her to leap off the bed, fingers hooked intoclaws, ready to rip into my face. Instead. the fire died as quickly asit had erupted. She left the bed and rushed to me sweeping me into herarms."My poor, confused, little kitten," she whispered holding me close."Don't you realize you have nothing to be ashamed of. Alex is who youreally are. You have always been her."John's bedroom faded. I found myself on a checkered.
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