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But I wasn’t lying about being busy at work. I was, and I truly couldn’t get away. It sucked that I couldn’t meet you earlier, but we’re here now,” he said. I immediately felt bad for accusing Derek of stringing me along and keeping me on the hook. Was this my life now? Perpetually feeling bad at the men in my life? Throughout the lunch date, Derek kept making suggestions, telling me that his car was parked behind the cinema and pointing out that it was private back there, it being lunchtime on a Wednesday. He also told me that there was a hotel not far from where we were lunching. The thoughts were tempting, very tempting, but I kept rejecting his ideas. “Your reluctance only serves to turn me on more and make me want you,” he said. I closed my eyes and exhaled. “Derek,” I said slowly. “This is dangerous and so very, very bad.” “But the forbidden element is what you love, isn’t it Janet?” he asked me. All I could do was nod my head and stare into his dark eyes. Derek seemed to be. Karen was friendly, pleasant and easy to talk to. She spoke with a soft reassuring voice, which put me at ease. We hit it off straight away.As we exchanged information, we realised we had quite a lot in common. We shared a similar taste in music and we both enjoyed nice clothes. We also found it freaky that we only lived about a mile from each other, but had never met until that evening.We were both getting quite tipsy and increasingly giggly.Karen suggested another toast."To the great unwanted" she proposed, we both giggled as we raised our glasses. Thinking back upon it now, I’d begun not to notice anyone else in the room, Karen and I had sort of created a bubble around ourselves.I leaned into her as we clinked our glasses together. Our eyes met but for some reason, we held each other's gaze a moment longer than we had at the first toast. In that moment something changed. I felt something, as yet unidentified, deep inside. My face flushed and my heart beat a little faster. We broke.
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