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.." ... and?" And ... I'm most likely the only guy in the world who gets to do this with you." No most likely about it." Why is that anyway?" Well, you're the only guy in the world who loves me." There's a laugh! Ninety per cent of Edmonton's male population would give their right testicles, and their grandmothers, just to enter a lottery to be where I am right now. And twenty per cent of the females." Goof back!" You're right, that doesn't quite work does it? The females don't have testicles. They could give their right ovaries then." That isn't love." Maybe not, but it's still true. Hey, what about your Dad?" I haven't sat in his lap since I was ten." Triple goof! He loves you, is what I meant." I guess I don't count my Dad as a guy. You know, he's my Dad." Okay, what about Ian? I bet he loves you."Pause."Um, actually, Ian's gay." No way." I mean, yeah, I think he does, but that doesn't exactly count. Like my Dad." Anyhow, that's why I'm the luckiest guy alive. I'm in love with the. I didn't believe it for a second. No fucking way! A son actually wanting to fuck his own mother? That was fiction... Shit, it was science fiction! When it came to the real world, mothers and sons couldn't be more distant from one another. I didn't even think of my mother as having any sexuality whatsoever, let alone find her sexy. At least not until that night when I walked in and caught her doing something you only see in porno films.She must not have expected me home for several more hours. I myself had planned on staying out later. After all, the girl in question had given me certain indications that I had taken as a sign that she was ready, willing, and able to screw me stupid. Unfortunately, when I made a move to act on that belief, the little prick-tease slapped my face and told me to leave. What choice did I have? When a bimbo changes her mind, she changes her mind. So I hightailed it back home, not having the slightest expectation of finding my own Mom spread out naked on the.
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