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.yes, no, no Idid not mean this , sorry..?Shelaughed, put her hand on mine: ?Don?t worry, but be honest, was it more or lessan idea you had in mind???? I did notknow what to answer, but I tried to give a diplomatic answer and still beinghonest: ?Well in all honesty, you are a beautiful woman and a lonely man issomewhere instinctively attracted?. She smiled: ?You have bad luck that itwasn?t my colleague who stayed here, because she is a gorgeous blond withbigger breast as mine, and men like that!?.? ?No?, I replied, ?she is indeed good lookingbut I do not fall on blondes. I love Latina type women?.? ?Then you are lucky? she replied while herdark brown eyes looked deep in me. Quickly she continued, but more seriously:?Look I like you and you seem a nice guy, but I am not a free of charge whore.Let me explain that ... my body?.(she correctedherself) needs a man more than only?every 3 months. But I am difficult, I do not need a man who plays a little with my breasts, jumps on me, cumming. Of course Mary wanted to know what was wrong, but I could not very well tell her. I just tried to compensate by going out with her alone.Then came those crazy, sweet, wonderful icy days in Chicago. I realized that I had never really been in love before. Not as deeply as I was with Eric. It seemed as if that blizzard blew away all the dust that had settled on my heart. All the ugly layers of distrust and cynicism were gone. I was sixteen again. I was an unwritten story. A wide-open invitation.My memories of those days gained a golden hue. I never felt this complete, this free. I grew on his love; I soared with him and never looked back.Then I threw it away in a few sleazy hours.I remember sleeping in the sun, that morning in August. It wasn't real sleep. It was this glorious fading in and out of consciousness. I floated from sheer oblivion into the hot, hazy borderland of sun-toasted daylight. In and out I floated until I didn't even know where I was. Or if I existed at all.The evening.
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