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Taking an excessive number of evening outs usually leads to a decrease in sex.”Leland said, “There are only seven nights in a week.”“That makes it easy to keep it under eight,” Stephen said earning a nod of approval from Magus.“Never tell your wife that the reason you lost two hundred dollars playing poker was because Chesty at the GoGoRama strip club was giving particularly good lap dances that night,” Oscar said. “I don’t remember if that led to my fifth or sixth expedition. That middle period of my marriage is kind of a blur.”“Vacation times can be particularly stressful on a marriage. Pick vacation spots that have an equal mix of food, alcohol, and shopping. You can’t go wrong if she’s spending your money while you’re drinking. You can still spend time together over meals,” Magus said.Oscar said, “Don’t suggest separate vacations and then let it slip that you were planning a tour of Nevada brothels. For reasons that escape me, wives tend to view that unfavorably. I was so looking. I am determined to never to look like a tomboyagain, much less a punk with blue or pink hair and ripped tights." You never looked like a punk, not even when you were in high school.When was that; the early nineties?" That may be, but, after the swap, I started to think about today'sfashions. They are much too tomboyish. I don't know why but I started tothink of sitcoms from the 50s and 60s, such as 'I Love Lucy', 'TheHoneymooners', 'Donna Reed', you know shows like that. I realized howLucy, Alice and Donna practically never wore pants (actually all femalecharacters of the show almost never wore pants).Rain or shine, they wore skirts and 'well-behaved' dresses, high heels,pantyhose, and of course on special occasions elbow (usually white)gloves. Those women were so pretty, so elegant. All of them. They couldbe tough and smart, but they were always so feminine even when they werearguing with their husbands. I swear I WILL NEVER WEAR PANTS AGAIN."."Never???" Well almost never..
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