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"What's wrong with this?" I ask, pointing to Harvey's groin. "Won'ttelevision give us better reception than a scratched, clouded andflattened Crystal Ball? (I am trying to get the Ball's goat. I knowit is still listening)."I'm afraid not. As you see, the television set is an antique, andthus is not hooked up for cable. I'm afraid we'll have to use therabbit ears as an antenna."I hear the crystal ball groan, but it remains dark, giving nothingaway.It's through the help of the many flickering "ghosts" on the 1950s'television screen that I can complete the tale of Laird and his family.If anything turns out not to be strictly accurate when the year 2021rolls around, it's probably my fault, not the ghosts', because I wasn'talways listening as closely as I should, inasmuch as I was constantlyhaving to adjust the horizontal and vertical to get any sort of pictureat all.Now where were we? Ah, yes, with Dr. Mercury-Wilde presiding over thejoint wedding. You may be wondering why the. I held her there for what must have been at least 5 minutes until she pulled her head back and looked up into my eyes with her puffy red, yet still beautiful ones. She didn’t say anything however, instead it was as if she was waiting for me to talk; and I obliged.I wiped her eyes with my thumb before uttering “Jade, you know I’ll always love you, no matter what. You’re the most beautiful girl in the world and you deserve so much better than him. You deserve someone who worships the ground you walk on.”She pulled a smile from somewhere before resting her head back on my chest. I knew she needed me right now and I wasn’t going to let her down.“Me and Banksy are going to a bar in London tonight if you want to join us, get you away from him for a night, give you chance to think and drown your sorrows with some top shelf vodka.”She giggled a little before replying “I’d love that, what time?”“I’ll pick you about half 7.”“OK, thank you. You’re such a good friend Dan Dan.”These words gave me.
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