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Then I get to learn all of my nicknames. When ever I meet someone new I automatically say ‘What’ll ya have?’ I’ve gotten a lot of funny looks from people until I tell them what I do for a living. The interesting part of my profession is that I DO get treated as a professional. When I took my first bartending job, I had no idea that I would automatically achieve the same stature as a doctor, lawyer, or accountant, even among the members of those professions! Not only that, but on a good night I can make one-tenth of what they make without the worry of support staff, errors and omissions, or professional liability. I even helped console some of the jurors in the OJ case. They took a lot of consoling. As most professional barkeeps know, the most closely related profession is lay-psychiatrist, followed closely by detective. I’ve always thought that experienced barkeeps should automatically be accepted as inspectors for the Department of Weights and Measures, but our bosses made a pretty. Now please take off your panties.’ She listened, standing stock still, till she realized she wasn’t breathing, then forced herself to move. She matched his slow strides, staying close, pretending to browse casually. He was listening, or waiting, strolling slowly up and down the aisle hidden from her, his footfalls soft and unhurried. What was going on, she wondered? To distract herself from wondering, she looked for the first time at the book titles, and groaned inwardly. The books were all to do with gay and lesbian issues and erotic fiction. She hoped none of her friends saw her there. ‘Good girl.’ came the quiet voice, smiling now. ‘Very good.’ There was a part of her that wanted to fly into an indignant rage and confront him for that, for calling his girlfriend or wife or whoever she might be a ‘good girl.’ Part of her wanted to slap his face and tell him to join the rest of us in the new millennium, to strike a blow for women everywhere….but that feeling was fleeting. There was.
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