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.My friends and I were off to the annual Christmas ball for young people in the countryside one of those farmer things, having just passed my driving test I opted to not drink and drive. I was 19 and I thought me turning up in a car would surely catch the eye of someone. I was staying at my friends house to make the weekend of it so we all met round there before we headed off. My friend Charlie lived with his mum who was great fun and a lovely lady, she was older, divorced and quite a large lady. Who am I trying to k** she was right up my street, brunette with a gorgeous smile and from what could make out HUGE boobs and would be classed as a BBW for sure. As you can guess I had masturbated over the thought of her many times, I still do haha!Anyway my plan of pulling up to the ball in my dads 3 series convertible didn't go quite as planned, the ladies were more interested in the boys with tractors than those poncing around in future classic! For me the night turned out to be a long. .. On any fcking land I wish! No questions asked! Do - you - fcking - understand?!”The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher’s enormous, angry bull ... With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he’d sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified.The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs... “Your badge, officer, show him your f*cking BADGE!!”✧ ✧ ✧This one is from TLSBThe Lone ranger rode up to a ranch house and the rancher exclaimed, “A masked man! You must be an outlaw!” “No Sir,” replied the Lone Ranger, I only wear this mask because of the coronavirus pandemic.”✧ ✧ ✧Say thanks to NipSC4328 for this one:Don’t eat chicken sandwiches, no matter what!!A little boy and a little girl attended the same.
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