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"I hate you!" she sobbed, "What pleasure can there be in hurting me so?" she asked through her tears, and as my guilt returned I resolved to leave her alone, I eased back but as I did so the need overcame me and my testes churned and the seed gushed forth, some inside her and much up her belly and up between her breasts, "Ugggh!" she protested, "If I never endure such a disagreeable experience again it will be too soon." Well that shall be instantly!" I rounded on her, "Because you are become a woman, my woman, if you find it distasteful then learn to use your hands and mouth, I've claimed you now young lady, you're mine your estates are mine, and when I am denied a whore you shall serve me." Beast!" she snapped. "I'm bleeding!" she wailed, "Look!" there was the faintest trail of blood."My fellows say this is always the consequence of marriage, here let me look." I asked and thus I found myself inspecting her innards once more. "It is nothing!, It is beautiful." I replied."Oh my you. There is too much in her mind, too much extra, too many layers and I can’t reach through to base where truth lies.Irving says is all right, he does not expect perfection, but I am unhappy with myself. Even when Linda tells me the same as we drive to home I remain displeased.Only in the night when I am nearly asleep do I suddenly understand. Of course this woman does not lie! I feel very foolish that I have not seen this before. She fears for her man, her husband. She did not know of the crime that he has done, she only wishes to protect him, and she feels she should not say this for that reason. It makes deep conflict in her. I hear again her voice, the words she says, I see in my mind her movements and how she holds herself, and I am sure.Again I rise in night, and go to other room, living room. There I go over again and again in my mind. Yes, I am sure, I know this to be so; I should have known this then, I should have said.I berate myself for this when Linda comes again as she did.
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