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I spent hours every week washing andvacuuming it. I was so damn proud that while it was five years old, itstill glistened like it was sitting on the showroom floor. But somehow Iknew it wouldn't be there. It wasn't. I found myself staring at a pinkMini Cooper convertible."Seriously?" I exclaimed to no one. "Seriously? A freaking Barbie car?"I opened the door and got in. At least it was a stick, although thebling-covered shifter knob was totally girly. What really struck me wasthe absolute mess the interior was. I scanned the seats and floors andsaw a jumble of fast food wrappers, empty Diet Coke cans and wine coolerbottles, empty tampon applicators and lipstick tubes, broken sunglasses,junk mail and gossip and fashion magazines, crumpled cigarette packs,tights with runs in them, dirty underwear, swimsuit tops. I sighed,started the car, and roared toward the Coffee Shack."When I pulled into the lot, I saw a line of half a dozen cars waiting atthe window. As soon as I stepped through. “That’s a personal question,” he said. “…but no, I haven’t.”“Are you a faggot?” said Zelda. Dorcas shushed her, but then added: “It’s okay if you are. This isn’t like those fundy planets. We have lots of boyfriends we can introduce you to.”“That won’t be necessary either. Excuse me, I have a call.”Their host left. Zelda scowled and broke her wine glass. Dorcas tugged her lower lip in thought. They walked back to the rocket limo and locked themselves in. Zelda lay on the backseat while Dorcas gave her a massage. “Where did we go wrong?” said Zelda. “He must be some kind of freak. That’s the only explanation that makes sense.”“Maybe we’re just not his type. We can’t be every man’s type, no matter how hard we try,“ Dorcas said. “Honestly, I think he‘s fascinating. There‘s something about him, just like Annabelle said. I honestly don‘t know how to describe it.”“Next time we’ll approach him one at a time,” Zelda said, muttering into the seat cushion. “Some guys don’t like the twincest.
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