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”Gayle paused. She was wearing a tight skirt and high heels. “Oh very well then,” she huffed. “But you’ll have to help me over the fence.”“Put some jeans and trainers on,” John suggested, knowing what her response was likely to be. He wasn’t disappointed.“Don’t be stupid. I do not dress down like some common chav.”‘No, you dress up like some common tart,’ John thought, but didn’t say. It was true. At forty-seven Gayle wore clothes that were far more suitable for someone twenty-five years younger and six sizes smaller. Almost invariably the clothes she did wear were a size too small: she insisted that they were small, not she large.It was a struggle getting Gayle over the fence, but John managed it. “Start with the outside freezer,” he suggested. “We haven’t been shopping yet this week.”Gayle scowled at him, but she recognised the sense of his suggestion.“It’s all fuckin’ uncooked stuff,” she complained twenty minutes later. “Don’t they know how to do things properly?”“Properly?” asked. “Oh fuck!” “Hmmm…? Can’t you handle me, Gerry? I wonder what the Herald would make of my little story, eh?” “You wouldn’t?” “I can read it all now. Top Fleet Street editor seduced by ‘the porn MP.’" “There’s no evidence!” “Unless you count the hidden camera and microphone on my desk.” “What?!” “I’m sure your bulging erection has been captured very nicely.” “Oh shit!” “Now, what would the headline be, I wonder? ‘A general erection, maybe?” “What do you want, Jenny?” “A deal. That is all. I’ll send you away with a smile, if you’ll print a full and I mean a full retraction on Monday. And of course, ‘the tape’ has to go missing.” “Okay.” “Now, where were we…” Jenny rolls her chair towards Gerry and begins to unbuckle his belt, unzipping his trousers with her other hand. She slides her palm over the outline of his inflated penis, and licks her lips. “Hmmm... there's plenty for a girl to work with here.” Gerry nods and smiles nervously. The naughty election candidate stands and unbuttons.
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