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And most recently, I’d run away from Kara when she’d had her meltdown.As I thought about it, I realized that I’d had the same response with Joyce, only I’d used emotional distance, not physical distance, to separate us. I’d done the same thing with Jennifer when she told me she was going to Stanford. In both cases, it had been Bethany who’d pushed me to close the emotional distance, even if the physical distance remained. That was what I was trying to do with Joyce now, but there were lines that I was not interested in crossing at this point.And that, in effect, brought me right back to Joyce’s question. I wasn’t sure of my own motivation with Joyce. I most certainly wanted her as a friend, though my need for her guidance with regard to my ‘business’ dealings was greatly reduced since her grandfather had set things up so that I was unlikely to encounter the kinds of dilemmas I had before. With no direct exposure to the more unsavory parts of the Outfit, I could, in effect, pretend. "Absolutely", I said. She sped off and we headed to her house, the signals were clear and unmistakable. Me unknowingly ignoring her really lit her fire. As she drove she asked, "When am I going to meet your parents" ?.Her having moved here only a couple months ago and our summer being consumed by various individual activities, we just didn't take the time for the usual formalities."When do I meet your's", I retorted.At that point nothing else was said. I sat there thinking I don't care about that shit anyway. All I had on my mind was fucking her pussy. We got to her house and went inside. "I'm going to change", she said which I immediately asked, "need some help !". She looked back and rolled her eyes as she walked down the hall.Why does she have to make this so dam difficult I thought. I headed to the nearest bathroom, used it, then put on my bathing suit. When I got out I heard her from another room ask me, "You want to walk or drive ?". Their neighboorhood has a community.
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