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Her hands were next to mine. Halfway through the movie and bottle, my new roommate girl had to go to the restroom. She lifted the blanket and found a boner on me! Then she smiled and silently left.The Punjabi girl got back from the bathroom after 2 minutes with her nipples poking through her red t-shirt. Her bra was missing! What a sight it was and her Indian ass was clearly visible through her shorts. This time, she sat closer to me and her hands were on my thighs.I was getting a little tipsy and horny at the same time. I poured more whiskey in both our glasses without moving and she gulped it in a shot, so did I. This time, we were getting high and her nipples were getting harder, which I could see because of the light from the laptop screen.Tanya made the first move by placing her hand close to my crotch area and moving closer to my hard dick! I turned and looked at her. Then my roommate came close to me and started kissing me. We were suddenly kissing passionately for about 5. How’s your day if it’s good you’ll need wine to celebrate! If it’s bad you’ll need wine to feel better!Never walk a mile in my shoes. You will just end up drunk, lost and looking for your shoes.If a woman says do what you want. Do not do what want, standstill. Do not blink. Don’t even agree. Just play dead.Yes officer, I didn’t see the speed limit sign, I just didn’t see you!This group is compliments of Alan B.Still more hand-picked lousy humor...Why is a woman like a condom? Because both spend more time in your wallet than on your penis.My girlfriend’s dad asked me what I do. Apparently “Your daughter” wasn’t the right answer.What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.The teacher asked Jimmy, “Why is your cat at school today, Jimmy” Jimmy replied, crying, “Because I heard my dad tell my mom ‘I’m going to eat that pussy when Jimmy goes to school today’”“Babe, is it in?” “Yeah” Does it hurt?” “Yes” “Let me put it in slowly”.
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