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Never allowed to stay in the barn past 10 before, Addie had never seen the behavior of the kids who stayed out all night. As the radio played the sixth Luke Bryan song in 30 minutes, the DJ called out the time, 11:45. She took another swig of her vodka and Gatorade mix as she stood up to join the group in the hay dusted lawn chairs. A couple of the guys stopped their conversation to give her the once over as she sat down, pulling her denim skirt as far as it would go down...which wasn't far. She adjusted her blouse, unintentionally maximizing the amount of cleavage on display as she did. Addie looked around at the guys in the circle. Why was she nervous? These were her friends. She'd been in Trevor's class in school since the third grade, Evan and Eric lived on her road, Courtney babysat her as a child and Erin and Jessica were in her 4-H camp tent site for three or four years. The only remotely unfamiliar face was Amos, the strong and silent type with a goofy smile who had three or. It’s fun to call him...”Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!” He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing.-- Steven WrightWhen will all the rhetorical questions end?We have mileage, yardage and footage. Why don’t we have inchage?Bumper Sticker:If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you.The other day, I was walking my dog around my building ... on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.-- Steven WrightStudies show that 100% of those who advocate abortion are people who already have been born.What’s dumb? Directions on toilet paper.What’s dumber than that? Reading them.Even dumber? Reading them and learning something.Dumbest of all? Reading them and having to correct something you’ve been doing wrong.Some time ago, there was this artist, who worked from a studio in his home. He specialized in nudes, and had been working on what he thought would be a masterpiece for several months now.As usual, his model reported, and after.
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