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It's embarrassing to admit it, but being on my own that night (with my husband on his business trip) I masturbated to the fantasy of being taken by big tough Otis and his huge stiff meat-log. It took my breath away just to imagine that thing stiff and engorged with male lust. I came on my fingers twice as I imagined what Otis could do to me with his huge weapon. It's horrible (but not as horrible as what I've done since) but I went to the warehouse again the next day just so I could ogle Otis' hard black body again and to reconfirm that I wasn't imaging that huge tool of his. I wasn't imagining it, it was real. As I stood at the top of the forklift ramp looking down on that huge black man I realized that I was going to have to find out what it would be like to have him. The thought scared me; this new obsession of mine could ruin my life. If my husband even imagined what I was thinking, he'd divorce me in an instant; it would disgust him and make me an outcaste in our social group.. It is common for peoplewith DID to have one personality who is alcoholic or addictedand others not. (He drinks and she gets the hangover and doesn'tknow why. This is funny but sad and frustrating for someone whohas to live with such a condition). First of all, check out someserious DID sites such as Sidran Foundation and InternationalSociety for the Study of Dissociation and start educatingyourself on this issue. Also check out some of the stories onDark Personalities website. Secondly, get back to the woman youare counseling (done - author) and ask her if her TGurl hasmemory lapses and difficulty remembering what she did en femme.It's the memory lapses that are the key to DID. Otherindications include an inability to remember much of one'schildhood and a history of childhood abuse and episodes of childbehavior. The wish to be treated like a child can be anindicator that a child alter exists and wants to come out (childalters exist in almost all DID people). If the woman you.
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