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“what do you want?”, was her cold bitter reply which broke all my courage and made me look like a stupid old fool. “i didn’t want to hurt you I m sorry”, I said hoping this would melt her anger a little. “what do you mean!” she exclaimed. I pointed at the results board. “you are gonna bite the dust next term. Shameless!”, she said as she shoved me away. Damn! What did I say wrong!And then I realized what a great fool I am. Next day I apologized her at least 10 times before she agreed to have a cup of tea with me at the canteen. It was a matter of time before we were friends and soon good friends and then what she called were best friends.I came to know about her lonely life. What made her so alone and grieved. It was that her parents passed out when she was very young. She grew up with her uncle and aunt. Though they were obsessive she never complained. They made her do odd jobs but didn’t interfere in her studies as they knew she was a bright student. After 12th she joined the. What do they say? Waiting’s always the worst. Those words seemed etched into my brain by a powerful and painful industrial acid that evening. Or maybe carved in with the bluntest and most rusty of pocket knives. Whatever the metaphor, it was hard as hell to sit there at home, once again alone, wondering what was happening between Jill and her one-time boyfriend Callan. Conjuring in my mind all kinds of imagined scenes and outcomes – the ones that came to me naturally never-ending well, only counterbalanced by my rational mind’s much more two-dimensional monochrome happy endings. One a deeply felt and painful fear, the other an artificial and manufactured happy ending to cheer me up.As I sat there stewing in my suffering, squeezing my hands and feeling my empty ring finger, I briefly toyed with calling or visiting Veronica, before remembering she’d be at work. So, the only practical thing I could think to do was to drive by the clubs and see if I could spot Jill’s car outside..
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