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"And why are you wearing my underwear?" I asked him."I like the feel of the lacy material on my bare skin," he said in a tiny voice.I put the dirty magazine in front of him and pointed at a picture of a naked woman with big breasts. "So, you like bare boobs?" Yes, err – yes!" he said in a raspy voice, distressed a bit by my choice of words."Have you ever seen bare boobs for real? Not in a picture?" I asked, still flicking through the pages of the magazine."No," he answered. His regret and disappointment was written on his face and showed in his voice."Would you like to see some real bare boobs?" I asked him.That question surprised him, but what surprised him even more was the sudden change in my voice. "If you want to see real boobs so badly, you can see mine," I informed him.That remark hit him with a mixture of shock, fear, and excitement. I wanted nothing more than to see my younger brother naked, and for him to see me the same way. Instinctively, his eyes drifted over my body. I. I had never given transgenderism much thought. Other then what one sees in Hollywood movies, that's about all I knew. I had seen Sex in the City and Mrs. Doubtfire, things like that. That was my idea of what transgenderism was.It was Jen and Sandy (the lesbian couple) that forced me to start thinking out of the box. Questioning my ideals of what I thought was normal and necessary.Still, it took time and a lot of talks with Jen and Sandy to come to terms with me finally looking past my denial of fact, as to who and what I really saw myself as.There were a lot of little baby steps taken, the plucking of eyebrows, the wearing of small amounts of lipstick or eye shadow, getting my ears pierced, to finally the day I wore a bra and breast forms and went out with them dressed enfemme and butch, in a woman's business suit and a blouse.Later, I became a "certified lez" (and the designated purse carrier), when we went out. After a time, I always went enfemme with them. It got hard not to dress.
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