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Pulling in behind him, the trooper got out of his vehicle and walked up to the Corvette. He looked at his watch, then said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a new reason for speeding -- a reason I've never before heard -- I'll let you go."The old gentleman paused then said: "Three years ago, my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back." Have a good day, Sir," replied the trooper.GeorgiaThe owner of a golf course in Georgia was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.He called her into his office and said, "Y'all graduated from the University of Georgia, and I need some help. If I wuz to give yew $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everthang but my earrings."LouisianaA senior citizen in Louisiana was overheard saying... "When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana..."When asked. He fought against his bounds fruitlessly as he tried to get to her lips, neck, chest, anywhere, and all she would do was laugh. Finally she pushed him flat against the bed, holding him still, and brought her lips to his. It was like sweet release, her lips were soft, and the kiss was sweet, but all to soon she broke away, and he tried to follow her up to continue the kiss. She pushed him back down again, emphasizing that she was in control and he was at her mercy. She came back down and kissed him again, and this time her mouth opened slightly and he gladly followed. Her tongue snaked into his mouth, tickling the roof of it.The kiss lasted for only a couple of minutes but to him it felt like a lifetime. She moved from his lips down to his neck, running her teeth across it, and kissed her way down his chest and stomach. All he could do was look at her as she kissed his way down his body, looking up at him and smiling the whole way. Then she sat straight up looking down at him running.
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