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" Then, we crashed. For a long time it seemed like there was nothing. Just the after rain smell and pain. The pain was the worst. I couldn't move and something was in my stomach. Then I passed out. When I woke up, I was lying in the hospital and all these tubes were sticking out of me. The doctor gave me anesthesia and performed surgery. That's what left the scar. When I woke up, my mom blamed me for my dad's death. When I heard he was dead, I went hysterical. They gave me some medication and I couldn't think straight. When the medication wore off, my mom continued berating me. Till this day, I can hear her voice scolding me."I sat and tried to control my sobs. Ben sat there, staring into the distance."Elowyn. Change is about letting go and taking risks. I know it's corny, but it's the truth. I know you feel guilty, but it's not your fault. I've never met your dad, but I know he loved you, and would do anything for you to live."I sat and pondered his words. I knew my father didn't. "Hey, Jake." Came the pleasant quip a split second before the thought entered my head that Samantha hoped I wasn't embarrassed by her having saved my ass this afternoon. A lot of guys would have had their pride hurt, having a girl come to their rescue, but it never bothered me. I make overtures to pride of course; I never groveled or begged to not get beat up. For some reason, in my mind, getting the crap beat out of me by some thug twice my size was nowhere near as humiliating as begging that thug not to beat me up. Of course, I wasn't a masochist – once the beating started, anything I could do to shorten its duration or if someone or something intervened, well, I took whatever I could get."Hey, Sam. Have a seat. Thanks for this afternoon." I added to allay her concerns.She plopped down in the lawn chair across the table from me. If I tilted my head just right the umbrella shaft perfectly dissected her face – but I didn't want anything in the way of her angelic features. She was once.
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