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”As the dinner progressed past the appetizer my sister asked me about my latest attempt to find a girlfriend. I told her about the most recent failed date and that I'd pretty much given up on looking for a steady partner in sports bars. “You should try libraries, you know, where brainy young women driven to research and abstinence hang out” she joked.“It's not the abstinence part I’d be interested in, I have enough of that myself.”Paula s eyes locked on mine for a brief second, “Yeah, I'm not interested in that either but with Tad gone, it's forced on me.”When I dropped her off at her house Paula leaned to me and kissed my cheek then asked “What are you doing for the rest of the night?”“There's a rerun of Armageddon on TV, it's a great movie.”About an hour after I got home, just about the time Bruce Willis was trying to shoot Ben Affleck my cell chirped, Paula had sent a text.Helo?Whatwnt 2 get laid?Alwayscm hreu have a frnd 4 me?Wait, u'll C. Door is unlocked.An invite from my sister. No-one other than Grandad knew that the reason that the Dux of the school could not accept his award in person at the graduation ceremony, was that he simply did not exist. I had invented a ficticious student called Fred Quimby and submitted work under his name, I responded to his name during the weekly roll call, as well as taking all tests for him. The teachers were so over-awed by this student’s brilliance that they could never contemplate the fact that such a person existed only in my mind. The day that the university placements were announced, and Fred gained the highest place in Medicine, Fred and I disappeared off the face of the earth. No, come to think of it this would be all too easy, Fred and I beamed up to an alien space craft, to be used by aliens as an example of an intelligent humanoid life form, to be probed and otherwise examined so that they could gain an insight into Earth life? No, that would be just too convenient. How I managed to disappear was Grandad’s idea..
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