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She can go straight to hell. I don’t need her approval! What the fuck, Bethany?”“You are trying to get your sister’s approval as a substitute. It won’t work. Having sex with her is at least partly about keeping her approval. That isn’t going to fix a damn thing. It’s going to make it worse. I once told you that if your relationship with Stephanie fell apart, it would destroy you. I’m sure of that now.”I was red in the face from anger and took a couple of deep breaths to try to calm myself.“Did you listen to what I said to my mom?” I asked in frustration. “Did that sound like I wanted approval? No! I was telling her how it was and telling her to deal with it.”Bethany took both of my hands and looked me in the eyes.“That’s what you tell yourself. That’s how you cope. But deep down, in a place you don’t want to look for fear of what you’ll find, you want her to approve of you and to see you as you see yourself. She’s not going to, and until you give up on that, you won’t be able to. Happy thoughts of the fishing trip he planned to charter while in Saint Lucia made him smile also. He loved fishing and already had the names of several captains of charters on the island. The pilot had been right and as they gained altitude the atmosphere inside the plane cooled to a manageable temperature. John could feel sweat running the line of his backbone and on the back of his long sleeve shirt from the warm leather seat. He tried to relax, if for no reason other than to aid the pretty lady across the way. She glanced in his direction a couple times. He hope it was because she found him handsome, like Kathy had always said, but the truth from her expression looked more like fear being abated. They were about ten minutes out of Barbados and somewhat settled into the flight when John heard an explosion. He glanced out the window but couldn’t see anything. The others in the plane were equally alarmed. The noise and shake had been loud enough to get the beautiful girl beside him.
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