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“Your badge, officer, show him your f*cking BADGE!!”✧ ✧ ✧This one is from TLSBThe Lone ranger rode up to a ranch house and the rancher exclaimed, “A masked man! You must be an outlaw!” “No Sir,” replied the Lone Ranger, I only wear this mask because of the coronavirus pandemic.”✧ ✧ ✧Say thanks to NipSC4328 for this one:Don’t eat chicken sandwiches, no matter what!!A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends ... Every day they would sit together to eat their lunch. They discovered that they both brought chicken sandwiches every day! This went on all through the fourth and fifth grades, until one day he noticed that her sandwich wasn’t a chicken sandwich. He said, ‘Hey, how come you’re not eating chicken, don’t you like it anymore?’ She said ‘I love it but I have to stop eating it.’ ‘Why?’ he asked. She pointed to her lap and said ‘Cause I’m starting to grow little feathers down there!’ ‘Let me see’ he said. ‘Okay’ and she showed him ... He looked and. She was just turning 52 and he could not have been older than 29 and that was a world of difference. Still, he was an attractive lad and she certainly wasn't doing anything wrong just by being civil and talking to the young man."Yes, Jimmy, I certainly do remember. You did extremely well on the finals and I see you are honing your skills in self-defense."The charming young man laughed and admitted,"I am not that good at this stuff, Mrs. Goodpenney. I need to do a lot of practicing before I even get a belt. You sure are good at it. No fellow better try anything on you in a dark alley."Martha laughed at his easy manner and saw that he was just being friendly because they were both involved in police work."Please call me Martha, Jimmy, no need to be formal. Fancy a pint at the pub? I need to toast your graduating with honors."He grabbed his workout bag and followed her out to the street. She started to walk off in the direction of the pub but he handed her a helmet from a sleek looking.
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