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”“Look at yourself. Just like me, you’re pretty, thin and short for a guy. I would never have suggested this if you didn’t have all the ingredients. We already know how you feel about spending the rest of your life without any balls. Why not find out what it feels like to be a beautiful woman? Who knows, you might just like it.”It was all so incredibly bizarre. An hour ago, I was resigned to a barren existence. Now a total stranger was opening another door, to a place which terrified me. What would people say? Yet as I looked at her, watched her move and listened to the way she talked, the whole notion somehow seemed less preposterous. “What makes you think I’d like it,” I heard myself ask.“Maybe you won’t. Why don’t we find out? I brought some things with me, in case you’d like to try. Just for fun. What do you say?”How could I say no? After a week going stir crazy in my apartment, a beautiful girl wanted to dress me up in her clothes. Okay, so she used to be a guy. What did I have. The host would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out of the squeezed lemon would win the money.Many people had tried over time (weight lifters, longshoremen, etc.), but nobody could get another drop out of a lemon after the host had squeezed it.Then one day, a scrawny little man came in, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit. In a tiny, squeaky voice he said, "I'd like to try the bet."After the laughter had died down, the host said, "OK," grabbed a lemon and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little man.But the crowd's laughter turned to total silence as the little man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass.As the crowd cheered, the host paid the $1000, and asked the little man, "What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weightlifter, or what?"The man replied, "I work for the IRS."On his way home from work.
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